What to Expect at Your First Therapy Session
Booking your first therapy appointment takes courage. Knowing what will actually happen can make it a lot easier to walk in, or log on.
A lot of people put off therapy because they don’t know what to expect. Will I have to talk about everything right away? What if I don’t know what to say? Here’s how a first session usually goes in my practice, and what you can do to get the most out of it.
Before the session
- A short call: many therapists, including me, offer a free 15-minute call so you can ask questions and see if it feels like a fit
- Paperwork: you’ll fill out intake forms online, usually covering your contact information, insurance, history and what brings you in
- Consent and privacy: you’ll review how confidentiality works and its limits, such as when someone’s safety is at risk
- Insurance check: if you’re using insurance, your coverage and any copay are confirmed ahead of time
During the first session
The first session is mostly about getting to know you. It usually lasts about 50 to 60 minutes. I’ll ask what brought you in, what you’ve tried so far, and what you’d like to be different. We’ll touch on your history, health, relationships, work or school, and sleep.
You don’t have to share everything on day one. You set the pace. If something feels like too much, you can say so, and we’ll come back to it when you’re ready. Feeling nervous, crying, or not knowing what to say are all completely normal.
By the end, we’ll talk about first goals and what treatment might look like, whether that’s skills for anxiety, trauma-focused therapy like EMDR, or work on a relationship.
Good questions to ask your therapist
- What experience do you have with what I’m dealing with?
- What kind of therapy do you use, and how does it work?
- How often will we meet, and how will we know it’s helping?
- What happens if I need to cancel or reschedule?
How to know if it’s a good fit
Research consistently shows that the relationship between you and your therapist is one of the biggest factors in whether therapy helps. After a session or two, ask yourself: Did I feel heard? Did I feel judged? Do I have a sense of where this is going? It’s okay if the first therapist you meet isn’t the right one. A good therapist will want you to find the right fit, even if it isn’t them.
After the session
It’s common to feel tired, relieved or a little stirred up after a first session. That’s a sign you’re starting to process things. Be gentle with yourself the rest of the day, and jot down anything you want to bring up next time.
I see clients in person at my Temecula office on Wednesdays and Thursdays, and by secure telehealth anywhere in California the rest of the week. Many clients come from Temecula, Murrieta, Menifee, Moreno Valley, Riverside, Perris and Corona. I accept many insurance plans through Grow Therapy, Rula and Headway, and private pay is available. Learn more about my approach on the Meet Christopher page.
This article is general information, not medical advice or a substitute for an evaluation. If you are in crisis, call or text 988 or call 911.